Spencer was the perfect baby. A child with a bright future. A brilliant mind that was capable of changing the world. He made friends with everyone he met, and would go to any lengths to put a smile on people's faces. He was the best father this world has seen. His boys are now five and six years old. The were the center of his universe, and he was their very own super hero. I was so proud of him for his dedication to being a single custodial father. He would wake up every morning at 5 am, make them breakfast, take them to daycare, followed by working long days and hard labor in construction at Industrial builders. At 5:30 pm, he would pick the boys up from daycare, make them supper, give them a bath and read them stories. He did this with such consistency, pride and love. Every single day. He was a master carpenter, and certified bridge welder, amongst many other titles. But "DAD" was his favorite title of all!
Spencer and his brother, Tyler were 14 months apart. They fought like animals as children, yet loved each other with every fiber of their souls. They had one another's back through whatever life threw at them. They were never alone. Every Saturday morning, Spencer would call Tyler to come over for eggs benedict, a tradition he picked up from Grandma Sandy. When Tyler moved to a new residence, Spencer would follow, always living close. (like the next building over).
What many did not know though, was Spencer suffered from extreme anxiety since early childhood. He refused to take any medications. He kept his mental health hidden. He suffered in silence. He was the most stubborn guy, and so full of pride that he never asked for help. He considered it a weakness. But we are here to tell you, NOTHING was weak about our son. He was beyond brave. He was fierce. He lived his 10,213 days on this earth to the fullest. He gave life all he had. He made a difference! He also knew something far greater was ahead of him, than what he was leaving behind.
We try hard not to feel sad for all the moments that we are without him, but instead, we try to look forward to that exact moment we see him again. We want him to know we are doing everything we can to honor him and his visions. To create a legacy for his babies. We will work tirelessly to make sure we are there to listen to anyone who needs to talk. We want the world to understand that suicide is not a selfish act. It is the final symptom of anxiety, Of depression.
We must work hard to abolish the stigmas associated with suicide. With all mental disorders. We need to listen twice as much as we talk. We have two ears and one mouth for a reason, friends!
Spencer was the life of the party. He was loud. He was outgoing. He was hilarious. He walked into a room,. and it lit up. His laugh was infectious. If you didn't know him before the party, you were more than likely ready to ask him to be the best man in your wedding by the time you left. He had so many friends, a great career, a diverse, and loving family. But one thing you would never have guessed.... is that he was suffering.
Spencer had charisma for days. Brains for weeks. A smile for months. And love for years. He is missed so incredibly much by so many. He touched so many lives. Please help us keep him alive in your hearts, and choose to be kind to others. You just never know what they are going through!